Because of Him

First off, before I start into my entry and update on the past few weeks, I would like to share a link to an article regarding new findings on DIPG.   It makes me happy to see that some research is finally being done to study this tumor and get more information so that one day, and hopefully not in the too distant future, there will be answers, there will be options for children suffering from this dreadful disease, and there will be a possible cure.  Here is the link to the article.  As a side note, if you are wondering what all the talk is about #kerascrusaders and the facebook site started by Brian Phirst, who's son was diagnosed with cancer, it is about raising awareness for childhood cancer.  Kerascrusaders is the team name we picked for her. It is a virtual run that anyone can do who does any kind of aerobic activity and wants to post their miles or minutes for children to support them.  There are no monetary donations regarding this particular event, just the hope that our children will be cared for and receive much needed funding for research into these deadly cancers.  I know that with the Gabriella Miller kids first research that was approved and signed by President Obama, events like this and other forms of raising awareness really make a difference!!  If you want to get involved with the fb event and haven't already, you can send me a msg or fb msg me and I can help you get involved.  I am passionate about changing the current status of DIPG from 0 % survivers to curable!!
Here's the link to the article:

http://www.curebraincancer.org.au/news/1044/multiple-breakthroughs-in-childhood-brain-cancer#.U0T0__ViBoI.facebook

Here's another you tube clip that gives more facts and insights into DIPG.  It's around 7 minutes, but for those of you who have wanted to know more about the type of tumor Kera has and the statistics, it does a good job explaining it. I haven't shared a whole lot of information about Kera's tumor on this blog, I guess mainly because it is such a devastating tumor, and I don't like to dwell on the negative stats and devastation regarding this disease.  I haven't wanted others to lose hope for Kera's fight. But this is the reality of the disease.  I also know that there is always hope.  There are always miracles.  God has his hand in Kera's life, and if she is to live here longer on Earth, then she will.  I am grateful for finding a woman who has been studying natural and eastern medicines for 20 years who is currently helping to treat Kera.  I feel like if nothing else, she has given me hope again.  I have decided to stop the chemo and go the natural route.  The doctors say there is no cure, there is no hope, there is no chance of survival, but there is always hope.  Nevertheless, there does need to be more done to fight pediatric brain cancer.  Here is the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zwYYtw1sgow&sns=fb

Now for the update. Warning, this isn't going to be sugar coated.  I am going to state the facts, and those aren't always easy to hear. These past few months since late January when Kera's symptoms started to return have been SO ROUGH!!  Each week there are new symptoms, and each week there is less mobility, less talking, and more of her body giving out.  Right now Kera is not able to speak much at all.  She tries to talk, but it's very hard to understand her at this point.  She is mostly communicating by writing.  I hope and pray that her vision remains intact, as well as the use of her right hand, as I cannot imagine if she is unable to talk and see or write.  I don't want her to be unable to communicate her thoughts to me.  I ask for everyone's prayers that she remains able to communicate with us somehow. She has also recently in the past week or so, stopped trying to walk.  Her trunk and upper body have gotten weaker, and she isn't much less steady. Her legs still have some strength to them, but because her body in general is weak, and she can't balance on her own, she has stopped being able to walk.  I want more than anything to believe that she will be able to do these things again here in this life.  I know if she is not able to do so here, she will in the next life.  I also know that because of our Savior and the resurrection, her body will be restored to her and she will run and jump, talk, walk, and do back flips and tumble just as perfectly as she used to. I can't wait to see her do all of that again.
Even through all of the deterioration of her physical abilities, her mind is just as sharp as ever.  She enjoys playing games, and most of the time still wins them all!  I was so happy to spend a wonderful Easter Sunday with her today.  Friday afternoon her teachers from school brought over some amazing Easter baskets (laundry basket sized) filled with toys, games, puzzles, huge stuffed animals, candy and all sorts of great things.  They had a basket filled for each kid, plus a family basket and one for Dave and I with gift cards and money.  Thanks to all of the kids and teachers and one classmate's mom in particular who brought in the majority of the items.  Our kids were all overjoyed.  Then this morning the kids woke up to a yard FILLED with Easter eggs, toys and goodies.  There were well over 300 eggs on our lawn, thanks to some amazing neighbors of ours.  ;) The kids went out this morning to collect the eggs, and couldn't finish getting it all before we went to church.  It took them two more trips to collect all of them.  We also had Dave's mom fly in from Texas to stay with us. She was here for 6 months when Kera was diagnosed.  She was home for 3 months, and she is nice enough to come back. I'm so immensely grateful that she's here to help us out, as I've been so overwhelmed by caring for Kera and her needs, let alone 3 other boys, one being under 3!!  We spent an Easter dinner with Ann and my parents, played some games with them, and had an enjoyable day.  As I said, Kera is still able to keep up with us at the games.  She also has been having her teachers (she has two this year) come over once a week to give her hour long lessons.  she wasn't able to have them come for lessons this week, and she told me she wanted to keep them coming because she didn't want it to affect her grades.  Always the scholarly student.  :)  I told her she would be just fine.  Her teachers said they could just come for a little while and share a video with her or read a book, whatever she wants.
Seeing Kera's body give out on her has been so hard to watch.  She told me today that this might be her last Easter.  I asked her what she thought about that.  She said she has been feeling so sick and having such a hard time lately that she's just not sure.  She said she thinks she will get better though.  I hugged her and teared up at my brave little fighter.  she also told Dave and I a few weeks ago when she was still able to talk more that she didn't want to be here if she was going to be unable to talk and walk and do everything she used to do.  She said it was just too hard.  She also said that she wasn't ready to go to heaven yet.  I honestly don't think I'm ready for that either, but I also don't want to see her suffering or unhappy.
I have been diligently applying essential oils and giving her herbal pills and things that have been helpful in fighting cancer.  I know that they have been shown to help, and I want to believe that they can help Kera, but this is such an aggressive tumor.  It is a beast, and I don't know if I have the tools to fight it.  I think that God is the only one who can make it go away.
With it being Easter, it brings me such peace to know that the Savior suffered and atoned for each one of us.  He was crucified and resurrected three days later.  I know we will all be resurrected again.  I saw a video at church today, and I'm sure many of you may have seen it since it's been all over social media.  It is the title of my post #becauseofhim .  Because of Christ I can get up each morning and fight another day.  Because of Him I know my family will be sealed together for eternity.  Because of Him, we can be forgiven, be reunited with loved ones, be given strength to face our trials, have the courage to stand up for what's right, and so much more.  I will post the link to the video here.  For those that haven't seen it, and even for those that have, it's one that can be watched over and over.
I am so grateful for this Easter Sunday and for the knowledge that I have that our Savior lives.  He lived and died and was resurrected and so will we all.  All because of Him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_S3TI4bYerU

Thanks to everyone for your continued thoughts and prayers on our family's behalf.  Please keep them coming!! :)